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Slayer Is Boner-Iffic!Jester Vicar Presents...
Jester's Very Own
Linkz-4-U

When I began this odd little side hobby of web publishing, I was inspired content-wise (and in real life) by many of the folks that you'll see below. I'd like to give a shout-out right now to these wonderful and creative people, because if it wasn't for them, you wouldn't be reading this introduction right now. Thanks, folks: in your own way, each of you rocks.

Enough dripping sentimentality, already. On to the links...

Hioni's Heterodox Home page: Hioni thought that my review/essay on The Doom Generation was one of the best things she'd read in a while and gave me a link. Thanks a lot, woman. Really intelligent and a big booster of Gregg Araki, she's got some neat things to say. Unfortunately, some of her other movie tastes is extremely wack (Dracula: Dead And Loving It? Come on, woman!) Send her mail and tell her how much you enjoyed her stuff. Or don't.

The Richard Linklater Depository: my favorite film director of all time, period. This has a bunch of great stuff on his first four films (four, you say? check the page for details...), but nothing on SubUrbia. Oh, well. I asked if them if they wanted to link, but... what can you say? It's a must for anybody who loved Dazed and Confused, Slacker or Before Sunrise. It's also got a great section called Dazed By Days which you should check out very soon if you ever plan on being a filmmaker. I know I sure did. When I make my movie, hopefully he'll like it. I think he will. He'd better...

Enter The Sanctum: R. Eirk Ott is a great writer and one of the rare people in Chico who is not completely full of shit. He does a lot of writing and poetry slam readings, so if you're in San Francisco or Sacramento and his name pops up, go see him. Tell him Jester sent you.

Slayer: these guys never got the respect they deserved. Every time someone tells me how heavy Metallica's Black album was, I want to punch their lights out and then show them the real masters of disaster. Reign In Blood was one of the best albums of all time, and I hope someday I can get really drunk with Araya, Hanneman, King and Bostaph. Really, really drunk. No link. Sigh.

A South Park Information Center: this is such a great show, words are failing me. This site has just about everything you need. Scripts, clips, sound bites, interviews, pictures and The Spirit Of Christmas .MOV file. Be warned--it's about 54 megs, but it's worth it.

Advice A La Modem: even though Bondgrrl used a French phrase in her website title, I don't hold it against her very much because she's got one of the best sites I've ever seen on the net. Spend some time in her Rants section and you'll think you never left my sites. Good selection of MIDI music, too. A definite SuperWinner.

The Onion Online: when I first saw this site, I almost wet my pants laughing. Fake news that'll leave you scarcthing your head. Not for kids. Another SuperWinner.

Blur Of Insanity: I like these guys a whole lot, which is a really bad sign. They're also making a movie, something I'm doing as well. Another bad sign. They offer term papers for copying, information on drugs and seem to have a really snotty attitude toward just about everything. These are the people I was born to rule: my very own Minions Of The Damned. They are hilarious, and I'm waiting for the flick.

The Unofficial Doom Generation Page: Ivan Guillen's collected images can be seen all over all three of my sites, especially in the Black Hole Of Hatred. Gregg Araki's images look great, so I stole a lot of them from Ivan. He's being a pretty good sport about it, though.

Metallica Master Of MIDI: boy oh boy, I remember a time when Metallica used to be good. Not any more, though. Here is where you can find compact, nice-sounding MIDIs of their good songs. It's hard to believe it now, but there was once a time when Metallica kicked ass.

The Miami Herald's Dave Barry: once you've read enough stuff from Optical Illusions, you'll see who started me off. This is the offical Miami Herald Dave Barry site, complete with archives of columns and Dave's Greatest Hits (the one on the Dolphins is great). He won the Pulitzer Prize. He's great. And Dave, just so you know: I want your job.

Dave Barry's Pirated Stuff: this guy broke about fifty million copyright rules when he made this page, but I'm glad he did. About fifty Barry columns for your enjoyment.

Glen Murphy's Pseudo-Magazine: Glen Murphy is a writer from Who Knows Where that has put up some really good writing on the Web. He put up some of his own stuff, and then because he doesn't dislike people the way I do (joke), he accepted submissions from other people. Neat stuff. One of my stories and a Lint Trap is there.

The Eric Bogosian Home Page: I loved Talk Radio when I saw it and drooled over SubUrbia even more. I sent a copy of my review on SubUrbia to them and Eric's personal assistant said she gave The Great One himself a copy of my scribblings. Interesting. No link yet, but that's cool. As long as he keeps writing, I'll forgive him.

The P.J. O'Rourke Home Page: although it might seem bizarre to have two guys on such total ends of the spectrum (Bogosian & O'Rourke), it's really not. These guys exemplify everything that my own Optical Illusions is about: telling the world what you think and not giving a fuck what anybody else thinks. Plus, like me, they're really funny. Also, no link.

The Robin Tunney Home Page: I love her. She's talented. She's good-looking. She's a great actress. Now that we've got the requisite drooling out of the way, go check her out for yourself.

The 49er Haters Society: since I'm a Raider fan, it's a given that I hate the Niners, right? Wrong. It's not the team I hate, it's the fans. How good can a team be when mentioning who your divisional opponents are brings derisive laughter and scorn? And Niner fans are so proud of their team's ability to roll over cheesy opponents. These guys deflate the myth with style. Join them. Now! I don't need a link: their existence alone affirms my life.

Internet Movie Database Search: the final and absolute authoritative source for who said what to whom (and where), why they said it, when and to what eventual result. Over 120,000 flicks ready to be researched. Oh, my.

Mike Spinetta's Home Page: like myself, Mike is trapped at CSUC. It hasn't stopped him from being creative, though. Check him out and try his bean dip. He linked me!

The CSUC Orion: Chico State's student-run newspaper. It's pretty good. I wrote for these guys last semester. Check the Op-Ed section, you'll recognize my stuff. No link, but my new e-mail address is here.

Synthesis Magazine: I'm now writing for them again. Look for The Lint Trap and The Cancer Man. My old e-mail address is here, so that counts as a link (I guess).

Shock Cinema: this guy has much more server space, viewing time and spare time on his hands than I do, so his movie site is much better than my own Elysian Fields. He still gave me a link, though. Check it out.

Psycho Dave's Dark And Scary Place: No link here, but Dave was the guy who inspired my own little wild webdom, so I'd be a dick if I didn't include a link to him. A truly original page. The Recreational Christianity section is great.

View Askew Productions: the folks responsible for Clerks, Mallrats and Chasing Amy. No link here. 'Nuff said.

The Simpsons Archive: Self-explanatory. Some of the most insightful writing of the 20th century was done for an animated series... on Fox. Isn't modern society wonderful? Again, no link. Bastards.

Of Course, The Main Links You Truly Can't Live Without Are:

Jester Vicar's Optical Illusions: postmodern deconstructionism. Columns such as The Lint Trap, Cancer Man, Skin 'N Bones, plus essays, fiction, an on-line novel and more than a few real-life adventures (updated pretty often).

Jester Vicar's Elysian Fields Of Film & Fiction: reviews and thoughts on good flicks and books, both new and old (updated not very often).

Jester Vicar's Black Hole Of Hatred: stuff I truly despise like certain ex-girlfriends, working at McDonald's, the Dallas Cowboys and other icky stuff (updated whenever I get around to doing it or hating something new, which is not often).

Oh, And: I know, it's self-promotion at its worst. But hey, come on--they're my sites! While you're at it, send me mail at illusion@shocking.com and make me happy... or don't.